a short devotional
At the beginning of this year I found myself reflecting on what I really wanted out of 2022. I mean, 2020 and 2021 were painful, unpredictable and honestly, bewildering. How we have ended up in the place we are in right now is astounding. Never would I have thought there would be a pandemic. Once that came to realisation, I never would have thought that I would need permission to travel from the government. I found myself hoping for an end to the constant rule changing, restrictions, bad news, inflated death counts, scare tactics. Let’s just say, overall, 2021 made my heart heavy.
It wasn’t until late 2021 that everything really hit me and our lives crumbled like a house of cards, except we are still waiting to see where the cards fall. Despite being surrounded by friends and family, I was lonesome. Not lonesome for people, but lonesome in a sense of assuming no one else was in the same position as me, no one else could understand. And it’s true. Unless you have traveled during the pandemic, you wouldn’t know what it was like. It wasn’t normal.
We traveled to the USA from Australia to see family we hadn’t seen in 3 years due to the restrictions in place all over the world. We weren’t allowed to leave unless we had a compelling reason to leave, we wore masks for 24 hours straight, we traveled with a toddler, we did it all. It was a struggle and a relief when we hit land again.
It has taken me a while to put any of this down in writing. It’s something I have been wanting to share for some time. Many know our story, many don’t. Many see the pain and many don’t.
Anyway, despite all of the above, the hardship, the tears, the unknown… in January 2022 I decided that my Word for the Year would be COURAGE. I floated many words, Trust and Faith being among them, but I settled on Courage. It was a rough start to the year and I needed some direction. After finally landing on Courage, I prayed that I would seek it, show it and breathe it. I decided, yes, that’s the word for me. I needed faith in God that He had a plan for me, I needed Trust in that plan, but for both of those things and the everyday things, I needed Courage.
I turned to Day 1 of my 90 day devotional from the Daily Grace Co about a week into the year. I was a late starter, I always am. This is what it said:
JOSHUA 1:9
Haven’t I commanded you; be strong and courageous? Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.
“Nothing makes us feel more helpless in our fight against fear than the feeling that we aren’t strong enough to conquer it. We look at ourselves and think, I’m too weak. In light of that we are facing our courage can seem smalls. We often think that courage is the absence of fear, but courage is better defined as strength in the face of fear. For those in Christ, we do not need to look far for our source of courage and strength. God doesn’t command us to be strong and courageous to then leave us on our own in the fight against fear. He equips us by His very presence….when our fears threaten to overtake us, we must remember the victory we have in our great Saviour, Jesus Christ. “
I mean, really? Have you ever felt and seen such a sign?! Thank you Lord! That was it. COURAGE it was. I’ll admit there are days or weeks that courage fails to show itself. But I think to myself and back to that devotional, courage is not the absence of fear, it is in spite of fear. I have feared, I do fear many of the unknowns I face in my life, but I get up every day and I serve my daughter, my family. That must mean courage.
PSALM 23 The Lord is my shepherd; I have what I need.
I have what I need. I have what I need. Repeat that a few times and believe it. God has given us everything that we need.
While I find myself looking back on decisions, what could we have done different, what options did we have. Ultimately, I have to believe that the decisions we made were the best we could.
Right now we are finding ourselves in difficult paperwork piles, outcomes and decisions. I pray that we have the courage to take the next steps that we need to.
All of this to say, have Courage! He has a plan for each and every one of us! I am a work in progress, but I am working to be courageous.
I hope this helps somebody else not to feel alone. Or maybe others want to reach out and talk about their experiences. I plan to share more, but for now I will leave you with this:
PSALM 34: 4
“I sought the Lord, and he answered me and rescued me from all my fears.”